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Insecure about Weight
I wasn't insecure about my weight until I had my first baby. He was a 4 1/2 pound bundle of joy who came a month early and had to spend time in the nicu. After going through a month of depression and worrying if my son was going to come home it was finally over. But my depression wasn't. I started obsessing over my weight and wondering if my husband and everybody else thought I was fat. Of course my husband said I was fine but when his relatives would come over all I heard was “you’re gaining weight, aren’t you?” I would then hold my head down in shame and go in the other room. That made me really depressed and obsessed with losing weight. I really didn’t do much at first but isolate myself. Then I started eating less and drinking more fluids but the weight wasn’t going anywhere especially my stomach. I didn’t want to go anywhere not even stand outside in my front yard because I was afraid my neighbors would stare. My husband told me I was over exaggerating because I was not big. I’m 5’4 and wore 160 lbs. now id don’t know if that seems big to you but it was big to me and every time id look in the mirror I would see a roll somewhere I wasn’t fond of or my face would be too fat. I hated looking at myself in the mirror. Then I would compare my self to previous pictures I took in the past and wish I could be like that again. It was totally embarrassing for me. I finally realized I that I didn’t really need to lose weight just needed to tone muscle and get in shape. I did some research on the web and figured out how I could get in shape and feel better about myself. I took the time and put the information I found to use and now I look better and feel a whole lot better about myself. The moral of this story is, if you don’t feel good about yourself do something about it. Don’t just complain about it. |
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May, 2012
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